7/16/2011

So I started to write my book this week. I made a vow to myself that as I write, I will let the past go. It really has been working, too. I feel that things are finally starting to come together, and I thank God for it! I have lost family and very close friends because of my experience; but I have, surprisingly, not lost my faith. It was put on hold for a little while, but I never gave up on God. Even through all of the stupid things I did and the dangerous decisions that I made, God stood at the other end, waiting for me to wake up and smell the coffee. I did, and thank God!!
It has truly been a road of hard knocks for me, but I made it through, without even a broken bone. I have bruises, but even the dark ones are slowly starting to fade. Whether I won the fight or not is not important, it is whether or not I learned from it. I can honestly say that yes, I have learned and grown up a lot. I am still a kid of course, but not the same naive seventeen year old that I was three years ago, who moved to California with a boy she had only been dating for three months. I'm proud of myself for sticking to it, even when it was hard. Growing up is not easy, but it is essential if you want to go anywhere in life. And, like everything else that doesn't come naturally, it is dirty, hard work.
Anyway, I just wanted to openly acknowledge God and thank Him for all the work that He's done in me. I have enough patience to work with special needs kids, and a own a stubborn dog. That's huge for me! I falter sometimes, but everything always works out in the end, and I think I forget that too often.

Lord, thank you for being there for me, even when I couldn't sense it. You are amazingly wonderful, and those words aren't even enough to describe who you are to me. I have gotten so much closer to you than I ever thought possible, and I know that it must have pained you to wait so long for me. Thank you for being patient with me, though I know that I'm not always patient with you. I have no excuse, and that's why I love you so much, you don't require one. I humbly thank you, and ask that you please don't stop now...the fun is just getting started =)
Amen.